Cadet Kirk is having a good time at a Starfleet Academy banquet, despite the presence of the “grog bowl” – with every vile, if technically edible substance any passerby feels like adding to its evil contents, and traditionally used to punish the violator of even the smallest infraction of protocol.  But then things start to go a little bit too far...

Originally published in December, 1985, in the print fanzine “Trekism at Length” # 5.