Date: 09/16/2018 11:34 PM Title: Chapter 1
Wow. This was a bit different. Never would have imagined Spock getting it on with a crewmember in the corridors, but it worked wonderfully. Kick starting Kirk's jealousy. I always imagine Jim realizing his feeligs when he seems Spock with Leila Kalomi. But this works even better as clearly he signals to Jim that Spock is attracted sexually to males. Looking forward to Spock's POV next.
Date: 07/01/2015 2:49 AM Title: Chapter 1
Well, it might have taken you eight months to decide on the ending, but you decided well. It is unexpected, hilarious and formally compelling, closing the circle with the beginning. I enjoyed the whole story a lot.
Oh, thank you so much for the review! I am very happy that you enjoyed it and especially happy that you thought it was unexpected.= and hilarious (two of my favorite things when writing Jim and Spock stories).
Date: 09/26/2014 7:13 AM Title: Chapter 1
It was going so great until that ending--very uninspiring. ;-)
I'm sorry you were disappointed. Just so I'm sure that I understand what you disliked - was it their activity in the corridor, or was it perhaps McCoy's appearance around the corner? Or perhaps you thought it was going to end a different way? I appreciate criticism of all kinds because it always seems to add to more ideas later. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
Date: 03/27/2014 10:46 AM Title: Chapter 1
At first, my attitude towards Raymond (or whatever) was like "What! get that insignificant insect away from my OTP!"
Which was, of course, the perfect reaction provoked by you to make us feel just like Jim felt. I'm going to assume this was intentional on your part. Good.
It feels natural for Kirk to become possesive when faced with competition. He's that kind of man. I noticed some other readers syaing that TOS Kirk wouldn't say 'fuck', but I think he would. Sometimes you can see that he's thinking it. (Well I think I can, anyway.)
I always like it when things go wrong during sex and it can be laughed at. Is that a perversion? If so, thank you for allowing me to indulge in it. And a brand new anatomical reason, too. Like dogs. Doggy style.
Unimportant trifle: you could use a different style (like bold) on the story notes. Right now, in my browser at least, it blends into the story itself.
Oh - another review from you! Lovely. I have to confess I rarely am able to think about what I want readers to think while I'm writing. I write first for my own satisfaction and sense of fun, and then try to fix it up to the point that I hope others might enjoy it too before posting. But that said, I definitely did want readers to feel that sense of shock and almost-betrayal that I think Jim would have felt. And yes, I think Kirk would actively enjoy competition for the boost it might give to his possessive nature. I'm also very fond of sex that is somewhat realistic- in that things don't always go smoothly, and it was great fun to play with that in this story. I laughed so much at Jim getting himself into a tight situtation in this story. It might be a little over the top, but I don't think it's perversion at all! I do kind of wonder how our guys proceded on in their lives after they finally got together in their story. Somehow I think Spock might have - quite deliberately - provided a few more opportunities for Jim to exercise his possessiveness. Thank you so much for pointing out the bleed of the story notes - I went and fixed that.
Date: 11/29/2013 7:10 PM Title: Chapter 1
This is a response to your response to my review, rather than a new review. It looks like this site won't nest my reply under your reply?
YES! I think that Spock is usually underestimated by writers, and it drives me up a tree, which is one reason why I was so glad to see this story. I think there are a lot of reasons why Spock is usually badly written:
1. It's hard for anyone to write a character who's smarter than they are, and who among us could claim to be as smart as Spock? No one. :-) So I think Spock is written badly even in TOS canon. For example, I think a scientist of Spock's caliber could NOT have spent four years at Starfleet Academy, followed by eleven years serving under Christopher Pike, plus some additional time serving under Kirk without noticing that for a commanding officer to manage humans, he must manage their emotions, as well. So I completely disbelieve "The Galileo Seven," for example, because I think Spock would have been observing human emotions with great fascination and would have learned to manage them -- possibly even to manipulate them -- when it was called for. (My story "Whipping Boy" has a Spock who manages and manipulates Kirk (for his own good, not in a mean or selfish way), and I think this is consistent with what Spock should be able to do.)
2. Most writers, actors, producers, and directors have little or no scientific training, which means that most people who've EVER written Star Trek -- including the authors of canon -- don't understand how a scientist sees the world or what kinds of things a scientist would think or say or do. Again, this means that Spock is almost always written badly.
3. It's hard for most people to write characters who are larger of spirit than they are, which means that Spock (and Kirk) are frequently reduced and made smaller.
4. It's hard for most people to write characters who have greater emotional maturity than they have, which means that Kirk and Spock will sound a lot like teenaged girls when written by same. :-) Teen-aged girls should be allowed to write all the fan fiction their little hearts desire ... but it's nice to see stories written by mature folks.
5. A lot of fan writers are drawn to Kirk and Spock because of the beauty of their devotion to each other, and it's true that they are devoted, and it IS beautiful. But a lot of the folks who are drawn to that devotion are so drawn because it gives them a sense of security or permanence, yet these two are explorers with very dangerous jobs, and most writers fail to give them the level of adventuresomeness that a person who desires such a job would have.
6. Even Gene Roddenberry said that Spock was hard to write -- These Are the Voyages, by Marc Cushman, quotes a memo that Roddenberry sent around asking people to please try harder when writing Spock.
I could go on, but I've probably bored you enough for now. :-) Sorry. I'm a psychologist and former professor in real life, and that combination tends to make me analyze motivations, then lecture. :-D
Anyway, all of that is to say that I especially appreciate a well-characterized Spock (especially a well-characterized TOS Spock, since the new guy seems very unSpocklike to me), so I hope you'll be writing more in this fandom. ;-)
Oh my. I am feeling rather warm and smug about this Spock and very much appreciated right now. How lovely. All of your points are wonderfully valid but I especially like point 5 - that these guys are 'live on the edge' types, and it just doesn't make too much sense for them to be so terribly mundane in their personal lives. I've got at least a half dozen stories 'started' on my laptop that I go to from time to time when the muse demands and will certainly eventually post more. Terribly swamped at the moment - will have an Advent story but have an 8-5 job, am in theory writing a (non K/S) novel (we'll just see how that goes - never done it before) and have committed to several non K/S short stories for a couple of anthologies too so the next K/S story might not be until December. But I must say you've got me all juiced up again, lol. BTW - if you didn't already notice - there is a companion piece to this story telling it from Spock's POV 'It should have been Jim'. I'm going to go look for Whipping Boy now!
Date: 11/29/2013 5:31 AM Title: Chapter 1
*smile* People almost always assume that Spock is sitting around pining for his captain. It's very refreshing to see a sexually experienced Spock who's meeting his own needs and needs to be persuaded to have sex with Kirk. Brava!
Ah - thank you SO much! It is a little annoying to me that people for the most part seem to (IMO) underestimate him severely. I do have lots of different 'versions' of Spock in my head, and in some cases he's pretty clueless, and in others quite agressive - but just private about it, and then still others where he is somewhere more balanced. I love all of 'my' Spocks but I do think that such an intelligent, moral and courageous man would not be as passive about his own needs as he's usually portrayed (and i just can't see him as sexless either). I will say though that if you don't like a 'clueless' Spock you might not like my story 'The Year of Evaluating Stimuli'. Try 'Carnival' instead (grin). I really can't thank you enough for your comments.
Date: 04/29/2013 2:04 AM Title: Chapter 1
I really love this story and was think in the beginning of poor Jim slow on the uptake of just how he really feels for Spock. Took some doing but he convinces Spock that it was what he wanted even going so far as to say let us do it out here in the corridor. When Jim said that I was like crap they are going to get caught by someone and who would that someone be but Poor Bones. He is going to be scared for life now,:D :D :D. I could not but laugh especially when Bones said he was going to need one of those Vulcan adepts to wipe is mind for him. Thanks for the laugh and a great story. Would not mind if you wrote more to the story. :)
Thank you so much for the wonderful review! I will keep in mind the possibility of continuing it. Must admit I can see some possibilities hee hee.
Date: 03/07/2013 9:21 AM Title: Chapter 1
Wow, first of all, Spock must be supremely confident in the cleanliness of his feet, but if anyone could be, it's him.
Also, your Kirk sounds like Kirk, which is much appreciated.
Is Spock knotting Kirk? If so, not clear on why it didn't happen the second time. Be nice to have a sequel with Spock's POV so you can explain why Spock is dithering &SUCHLIKE. Kirk said it was logical, obviously Spock is a little slow today. :)
Lol - I feel it necessar to state that I personally have never ever found toes to be attractive ... and have no idea whatsoever why this insisted on being in the story. Knotting ... I had to ask Pamdizzle what that was! So no ... this was just my own take on how one aspect of Vulcan physiology might be different. I may have to include the theory behind that in another story. I like your suggestion about a Spock POV. Will add it to my list! But just to provide you with a tiny answer (pre-story because I would like to do one but don't know how long that will be) in this story Spock had previously convinced himself with many very logical arguments that there would never be a successful physically intimate relationship between the two of them. Thank you SO much for commenting and suggesting another story. Love, love, love comments!
Date: 03/06/2013 4:39 AM Title: Chapter 1
I may have had a stroke laughing so hard reading this. Dear god. And thinking of McCoy to . . . uh .. . just. too. much. I should never have stopped drinking.
Oh I'm so glad I could give you a giggle or two. I had an awful lot of fun writing it. Thank you so much for commenting.
Date: 03/06/2013 4:12 AM Title: Chapter 1
I have never read anything between these two, that was that bold...in the corridor, naked...doing the nasty...my goodness...and before that...so hilarious. It just sounded like themselves, if they were to pursue each other, especially Jim...
Jim can be so fricken jealous..'Don't want anyone touching you accept me..."
and the end...poor McCoy getting an eye-full..will he ever recover...
Awesome job my friend..
Poor McCoy (giggle). Added him in just for Pamdizzle, but glad I did, it just kinda worked. Very happy you enjoyed. Thank you so much for reading and especially your reaction. Love to know I'm giving people something maybe just a little unexpected or new.
Date: 03/06/2013 3:30 AM Title: Chapter 1
That was beyond HILARIOUS. Just when I began to catch my breath, ANOTHER outrageous thing came along! Brilliant!
Tee-hee. So very pleased you enjoyed it. Thank you for reading and commenting. So good for my soul.