Date: 01/18/2013 2:02 PM Title: Chapter 7
This has become one of my favorite WIP's (along with Spice) at the moment. I'm not worried about the whole medical problem sounding plausible since I, like you know nothing about it either so who cares? All I know is that your plot and characterisations are great, your dialogues ring true and I'm thoroughly enjoying the whole story so what more can a reader ask for? i'm certainly looking looking forward to more. You're a wonderful writer!
How incredibly kind of you. I'm constantly amazed by how nice people are: I shall commit your review to memory and remember it next time I can't figure out how to get Spock from one deck to another. I am so glad you are enjoying the story and fully intend to post the next chapter this weekend, despite massive alternative distractions on offer as two feet of snow settles in my back garden.
Date: 01/17/2013 9:30 PM Title: Chapter 7
Wow, okay - that was unexpected! Poor old Stonn, he wasn't such a bad guy...
You'd have been much crosser if I'd killed off Spock. Thank you so much for reviewing. I am trying to write Chapter 8 but keep getting distracted by the snow...
Date: 01/16/2013 11:30 PM Title: Chapter 7
"This was as good as it got – would have to be, would have to work, for everyone’s sake."
This line broke my heart a little - I can see Jim trying to convince himself. I also love how you write Bones. I wanted to hug him when he asked Jim about Spock's heart.
Also, Jim really should have watched Wrath of Khan so he'd have known what Spock was about to do. It was so blatantly obvious! I also apologize for finding it hard to suspend my disbelief on the medical stuff - which is very silly because I can ignore the disregard for physics from warp drive and transporters. Still, if Kirk's contaminated, should he perhaps be in isolation too? Ah well. Anyways, I find the loss of telepathy fascinating to coin a phrase. And interesting way to redeem Stonn, I have to respect his penance.
Thank you so much, I'm rather enjoying writing McCoy. I'm very conscious of re-writing Trek history here, which I'm slightly uncomfortable with and didn't intend to do before ending up writing a CT sequel - hence slightly cheating by building in overt references to TMP (Airlock Four) and TWOK, as you say. I know it makes it obvious and I hope it doesn't spoil the story too much. It's just my way of accommodating the divergence from canon. If I were less dysfunctional, it wouldn't be a problem.
Date: 01/16/2013 7:27 PM Title: Chapter 7
Aha! What a great idea. Oh, now, this is going to get really interesting. Didn't see that coming (although fully expected Spock to do some darn fool thing like taking deep breaths of an alien gaseous weapon of mass destruction just for kicks, sorry, just for self-experimentation -- at least I assume that's what he was supposed to be doing). A fully human Spock, eh? But perhaps we readers should be careful. After all, having is not the same thing as wanting. Or so I've heard.
One question re this section....
“Why is Spock alive and not Stonn?” he said to McCoy, eyes still on the biobed.
“Only one possibility, Jim. He’s only half human.”
I frowned too. Should McCoy's line read, "He's only half Vulcan." or possibly, "He's half human." ?
Gosh, you mean you're actually reading this stuff? Sorry, now corrected. And thank you for staying with me, regardless.
Date: 01/15/2013 7:09 PM Title: Chapter 7
Love your writing this is imaginative and given the whole area of psycho neuro immunology not too implausible. There is a lot we don't know about how immunity and endocrine system function together and a whole neuro endocrine system as well as the usual systems we consider. The implications for the future the routes now open to your fic are taking this tale where no author has gone bbefore
I love how you have explored the K/S dynamic in a military setting from the commander commanded point of view. Also your very strong characterisations and very male relationship mark your writing as something special.
Ah, thank you for this. it's amazingly kind. (I would say that there is a truly enormous amount I personally don't know about "how immunity and endocrine systems function together", but I was quite proud of myself for having heard of both of them.) And particularly thank you for your last paragraph, because that's very much what I've been trying to do - write the dynamic from the perspective of the military context in which I think they function (yet another context I know absolutely nothing about).
Date: 01/15/2013 2:55 AM Title: Chapter 7
Wow, I love the way you have intergrated TOS history into the weavingof your story, very neatly done.
So, I hang out with Dr's on a daily basis and I have to say, was not at all put out by the medical speak, or so called lack there-off, my belief was well and truely suspended though as it is when reading fantasy anyway.
I'm awonderin what your Spock is going to be like as a human and if this incantation will help resolve some things, or if his confusion and anger will surface and create more difficulties. Can't wait to find out.
See, I told you your job was more worthwhile than mine. Thanks for being so kind, although very much hope they don't treat patients your way like I've treated mine in this story... The great joy of writing FF is that there is a ready-made history there to reference, makes writing so much easier. See you soon.
Date: 01/15/2013 2:53 AM Title: Chapter 7
What a chapter. Realized I was barely breathing by the end, and of course, didn't want it to end. What a unique way in which to make Spock human. At the start of the chapter, I'd wondered if the virus would catch him and undue his Gol, but I hadn't anticipated this. Also had wondered if he'd save Stonn, or vice versa. But by now I should know you don't mix with predictability: I suppose if you do so at some point, though, you'll catch a few of us readers off-guard.
Liked Kirk's public address regarding his First. The question is, in the absence of Spock's humanity, would the intent have fallen on deaf pointed ears? As Spock blocks his receptors to all that is humanity, has his awareness of it languished?
I think you pillowed Spock away in sick bay in another story. I know the Vulcan can be a pain in the arse, but I hope you won't keep him quiet for too long. But seriously, I know you'll deliver something original and thought provoking for the new awakening. Until then, holding my breath and waiting for more.
Thanks so much!
No, please go on breathing... Apologies for sickbay, but you know it's hard to write a story about a military crisis with a doctor in a starring role and not occasionally revert to it. Don't worry, I won't abandon Spock there. Will go away and think up "something original and thought provoking", no pressure there. Thank you so much for this.
Date: 01/15/2013 2:46 AM Title: Chapter 7
I was delighted and surprised to see a new chapter as I had not expected another so soon. Poor Stonn! In the end, he turned out to be an OK guy after all. And Spock? Yikes! I hope that it is in the cards for Kirk to give him a thorough talking to at some future date and will look forward to another chapter when it is forthcoming. Thank you, dear Jane, for the highlight of my evening.
Hi, thank you very much for this. Lovely and unique for me to be anyone's highlight. Take care.