Date: 10/16/2012 3:46 PM Title: Chapter 1
Awweee....lol. Sweety and schmoopy, which of course, there is nothing wrong with. I would like to point out though, that the giant block of text made my eyes hurt. I think if you reformatted it a little, broke it up into some paragraphs, you'd get more reads. A lot of times, people see a giant block of almost a thousand words and run for the hills before even attempting to read.
Other than that, wonderful! :D
thank you and ill try and reformat it later sorry i hurt your eyes :P
Date: 10/15/2012 6:49 PM Title: Chapter 1
Ah, brilliant...brilliant..This was so romantic. You did an amazing job, showing mere innocent conversation can change so drastically. But, Jim was a gentleman, he wanted to say what was in his heart, and it mirrored Spock's as well.
And the picture is perfect for this story. Post more of your work, please. Thanks for sharing.
thank you so much for the review it means a lot and i will post more as soon as i get inspiration