Date: 06/19/2016 12:22 PM Title: Chapter 1
A wonderful story, one of the best K/S I ever read I'm sure. Very hot, by the way :-)
I must admit though that the ending did not convince me. I know that many fans believe Vulcans do not feel desire outside of Pon Farr, but that is not possible: in "Amok Time" it is revealed that T'Pring desires another man (Stonn) and he desires her, and he is clearly not in his Pon Farr.
Thus, the twist at the ending of your story is heartbreaking, but, if I may venture to say so, it is not logical. A very, very well written work of fiction, however.
Date: 07/28/2013 6:29 AM Title: Chapter 1
I really enjoyed the story, the plot, the action down on the planet (although I got a bit lost in the details about the Wielda). Every time I had to put it down, I couldn't wait to start reading again.
I liked the way you wrote Spock's rape, how it happened, very realistic, and his immediate reaction/condition afterward. Liked the way you had McCoy deal with it.
Nadia I enjoyed immensely. She's a strong character, obviously confident, sure of her abilities, and comfortable in her relationship with her superior officers. I particularly liked the way she interacted so easily with Spock - makes sense,as she must work with him daily on the ship. We so rarely see the scientific staff of the Enterprise. Her relationship with Kirk surprised me, but it didn't feel too out of place - I picture her as a woman in her forties, older enough than Kirk to be slightly mothery but also to fulfill something that he desperately needs occasionally.
T'serek fulfilled a need in the plot. I didn't feel we got to see much of his character, but then we didn't necessarily need to - he contributed what we needed to the plot - his desire for Spock, and the aching sadness of his death.
The pon Farr issue and sex scenes - I liked it all except lube for God's sake! No wonder Kirk found it so painful! Liked the way you wove the nagging possibility of Spock being responsible for the murders into our minds and into Kirk's.
The end - so sad! I understand there's a sequel, and I'm interested how their relationship evolves now - poor Spock, poor Kirk - how do you maintain a relationship I under those conditions?
Overall, a really enjoyable story, I understand it's about 30 years old, from a printed zine originally. Thanks so much for sharing it online - I'm in Australia, and when I first discovered fan fiction and slash about 25 years ago the print zines were all pretty inaccessible here, what with having to know about them, who to write to, how to pay for them (God, life has changed, the horror of international money orders is no more!) and the astronomical cost of buying them & paying huge postage! So I'm slowly catching up online.
Many thanks for a wonderful story!
Date: 04/03/2012 7:24 PM Title: Chapter 1
I have been dodging this story a few times now, I am not a big fan of OC's and rarely indulge in reading any story that supports them. But this story did get very good reviews so I decided to give it a try.
I will start by saying that personally, for me, you are an excellent writer and you deserve every ounce pf praise that is given to you on that account. I love your writing style; it is effortless to read, it flows and you get drawn into the story with this writing, really ten out of ten for this. Just AMAZING!
But I was very disappointed and extremely annoyed at the character Dray T'serek.
I will endeavour to explain why.
First off he has no character to speak of, no real personality, he's an excuse to make all the other people crazy with lust and make them do stupid things. While he is blissfully unaware of this, which makes it a very convenient excuse for him to do as he pleases and have no REAL consequences whatsoever.
He gets tossed from ship to ship? No real problem he's nineteen and he's better at command than Kirk and Spock put together.
He is moody. But only to such an extent that everyone has pity for him. He is sharp in that he is sharper than the scientists, probably more intelligent if I'm guessing where this story is going and he is much better than Kirk strength, wits and leader ability. Which irked me to no end.
If you want to create a new race, think them through carefully. In the whole part I read I could not see one fault in Dray T'serek.
The reason why the Vulcan's work is because they sacrificed so much in order to be who they are. They gave up emotion to prevent themselves from destroying each other. They are strong, yes and they can be vicious, but they never (or almost never) use this to their advantage.
They have faults, faults we love, but faults nonetheless.
Remember this when trying to create a new race. The way that this is going? Their race can take over the galaxy no problem, there's just no competition. It's boring, painful to read and quite frankly I'm starting to wish he'll end up in some horrible accident and suffer brain damage.
At least that would balance out the field... somewhat.
I know I'm being harsh and I give you every right to go to my story and do exactly the same to me. I won't mind, tear me a new one, but the reason I am being so harsh is so you can understand why Gary Stu's and Mary Sue's are so hated.
The dude is even more beautiful than anything in the galaxy stronger, faster, better pain endurance. He can probably look a Medusan in the eye and have no ill effects. He probably knows when spock is trying to communicate with him through telepathy and can probably resist Spock easily. If I start reading a story and I start thinking these things out loud and start rolling my eyes at certain parts in the story, then there is a big problem.
I stopped reading after he grabbed the Romulan by the neck and held him at knife point, it was too much. To tell you the truth I would have enjoyed it so much more if he was just a normal guy with everyday problems like everyone else and he just had a very strange effect on people.
I understand he is a warrior race, but so are the Klingons and they are NOT charismatic or beautiful, they suffer because they are solely warriors.
The 10/10 is not a mistake on my part I wanted to give you that, because it is my personal opinion and it is highly unfair that my opinion should damage the reputation of your story.
Like I said good solid writing style and the characters were in character, it was just that guy and because he played such a big part I just couldn't read further, it was too painful.
Good job nonetheless
Date: 02/20/2011 8:11 AM Title: Chapter 1
>>the strong arms returned the pressure, but his mind shouted into silence, his heart beat alone. There was comfort in Spock's kiss, nothing more.
I have never before witnessed such a blatant display of perfection and for this I thank you.
Date: 02/10/2011 7:18 PM Title: Chapter 1
Still can't figure out why Kirk thinks anal sex without lube is supposed to be a good thing. Hasn't he heard of Crisco? Or poppers? (*or getting super-drunk...* 8-p seriously, nobody should follow these suggestions. Ever. Except for the lube part.)
I guess Vulcans do it every 7 years because it takes that long for their partners to recover. Haw haw.
Actually, I really like the themes of this story: love, honor, control. But I think I mentally blotted it out because of that sex scene. I mean, srsly? Wow, Kirk, I always took you for kinky, but that is pretty extreme even for me. Dang.
And I'm still confused about what happened to kill Hillis and Craven. Something about the Wielda, Goren's weapon, abandoned cavevolcano dwellings, and the crew getting separated. But other than that, I have no flaming idea.
Your Kirk and Spock are very in character, IHMO. And the hunt on the ship was well-done. Spock is a logical suspect... in fact, I think Kirk suspects him from the beginning.
Date: 02/10/2011 8:31 AM Title: Chapter 1
I ran into a word I didn't know and was disappointed because I'd have to tear myself away from the story to go on the computer to look it up. Then I remembered I was on the computer. I love the internet.
I did read this story once before in The Price and the Prize (the print zine) but I had forgotten most of what happened... and I had forgotten the very unique writing style. Enjoying the punny little sentences.
One thing that does strike me about the difference in eras is that I wonder if we'd be so nonchalant about the captain sleeping around with the crew (even if we're talking about an older lady). There's something approaching paranoia about work situations these days. In the 50's big companies used to have mixers for their single employees!! Today I work with a couple, had one spouse received a promotion the other would have had to resign. I've always thought Star Trek told us (Americans) a lot about who we are and who we were--including "Enterprise".
Date: 10/08/2010 1:20 PM Title: Chapter 1
What a superb story! A very interesting plot with very well-drawn and believable other characters. Dray especially was wonderful. I love stories with a good plot and this had absolutely everything. You are a wonderful writer! Is there any chance that we might get to read the legendary sequel? I'm definitely adding you to my "I'll read anything you write" author category!
Thanks so much for posting this.
Date: 10/06/2010 3:47 AM Title: Chapter 1
It is written so different compared to now..I was glued to this to the very end....I enjoyed the fact that at the beginning Jim had no clue really that he was interest in Spock...only later we see he would do anything for him...he keeps saying ...Take what you need Spock....what a beautiful ending ...and I felt so bad for what had happened to Spock but he has his t'hy'la to make him forget all the pain and embrace the good in humanity...
Date: 10/05/2010 9:22 PM Title: Chapter 1
"No mirror had ever given him that bright, doomed beauty, shown him that young god cast down and sweating out the terms of his humanity. Far away he heard his own unimportant denial, but his body became imperishable crystal, filled with light. Canon of proportion, he stood spread eagled across the starlanes, shedding light." That's so truly cosmic, and I love it. I've read about this, but the most important thing was the experience of it (which came before reading): I knew that person's mate wasn't far away, creating this effect. I'm very grateful for this gift, and humbled by it. I am also grateful for the amazing work that went into the older K/S stories (they're very important to me today, even if I wasn't around yet), again because of the ideas they bring in about such cosmic mates. The ending here, omg: I am glad we still have ST:TMP...