Reviewer: Dracavia Signed
Chapter 5: Part Five: Tarsus
A wonderfully written story. The depth and detail of the crafting, this could almost be a universe all of it's own, without needing to be referenced as a ST AU. There are the bits of characterisation here and there, and universe history, that makes you look and say "Yes, that's what the future could have been if things had gone wrong when Earth first took to the stars." The build up and development of Kirk and Spock's relationship feels very organic and unrushed, making the point they're at by the end of the story feel like a very natural place for them to be.
At first I found the switch to first-person-perspective for Daniel's sections to be somewhat jarring, however after finishing the story I can see where the stylistic choice ultimately worked. It set him apart from Kirk and Spock, even though he was on the journey along with them, but instead of sharing with them he was an outsider looking in.
I also really like how the story ended, just enough wrapped up, bringing them to the next turning point in their lives. Of course with as open as the ending is it does leave me wishing for more, to know how their revolution goes, to know if Daniel ever finds the peace he lost. I'd like to think that they succeed and are free to live the rest of their lives among the stars, and that Daniel finds his peace some day, even if it isn't with a partner at his side.
So, ultimately, this babbling all boils down to: Thank you for sharing this wonderful piece of art with us!Author's Response:
A very belated “thank you” for your comments – much appreciated! I particularly appreciate your comment on the pacing of the development of their relationship because they both had a lot of ground to cover before they were truly right for each other.
When I began writing Daniel’s portion, he began “speaking” to me in the first person, and I quickly decided that, unconventional choice or not, I needed to tell his portion of the story in that manner to emphasize his isolation from both Kirk and Spock, as well as his sister and others in the community.
I would love to write a sequel one of these days – I just haven’t had the time. But in the portion in my head, they do succeed, and Daniel does find some measure of peace in his life.