Date: 10/26/2014 2:20 AM Title: Chapter 5: Surprise (Fortunately of Unfortunately?)
It is dramatic, and the possibility that continuing to carry the child could kill her makes it even more dramatic. But I could not see McCoy's saying "We're trying to decide whether to keep it or whether to give you an abortion." In the 21st century US (actually since the early1970s), that decision is the right of the woman who is carrying the child. Spock couldn't force her to have an abortion even if he wanted to.
That's true, but the only reason they're wondering if they should disregard that is because she might die, and they want to save her life. And if she dies before she delivers, then the baby might die as well, which would distress everyone even worse. Given the choice, they would rather sacrifice one than two. But Chapel has told them that she's keeping it, and she wil hold true to that decision. After all, she has more confidence that she'll survive, and she doesn't know that it's potentially killing her. It's unfortunate, but as she said, she wants a part of Spock so tha she'll always remember him and what they shared together. Or something for Spock to keep to remember her if something happens to her.
Date: 10/26/2014 2:04 AM Title: Chapter 5: Surprise (Fortunately of Unfortunately?)
Uh oh, this isn't good news for Christine and Spock. I hope she'll be okay and I hope that Jim doesn't feel too threatened by this pregnancy. Good chapter!
Jim doesn't feel threatened. It's just that he's confused because he was certain, as was everyone else, that Spock was sterile, and he's also upset that Chapel is in so much pain when it should be bringing her joy. But he understand how it happened, and that it was in the past. Spock and Christine still love each other, they're just not IN love anymore, if you get my meaning. But this is the thing that brings them together forever in some way, because neither of them wants to be rid of the child. However, Spock is in ove with Jim, and that isn't going to revert back to his being in love with Christine. It just means that he's going to be more concerned for her since she's being hurt by what's happening to her.
Date: 10/20/2014 12:54 AM Title: Chapter 3: Pon Farr
Ah, an interesting twist, that pon farr with Christine helped Spock survive but wasn't a true mating because they are not mentally compatible. This clears the way for a mating bond with Kirk, I would assume ....
In my opinion, the long paragraph that reference Spock's being sterile and what happens when the mates have different cycles struck me as too much information. It seemed that the real problem between Spock and Christine was lack of mental compatibility, and that was why the pon farr was painful for her; I think you could have left it at that. I'm not sure how the other issues factor in, or if they do.
Date: 10/17/2014 9:54 PM Title: Chapter 1: Coming Home
Interesting beginning. Is a 3-way among Kirk, Spock and Chapel on the horizon?
I was a little puzzled by this: "He went on to talk [to Kirk] about everything else they had done up until the day Chapel had returned to Earth, and they had parted with a hug and no hard feelings."
Do you mean that Spock and Chapel parted with a hug and no hard feelings, or was it Spock and Kirk? Why would there be hard feelings - because Spock would not make love with Chapel? Just wondering ...