Date: 01/20/2014 4:14 AM Title: Chapter 4
Great story, I love your writing which is never harsh or hurried. When Jim is under the influence of the temporary shield we actually FEEL the distance he has to anything surrounding him, so well done. It is an illustration of the difficulties Spock must have in processing or reacting to emotions as long as he tries to be all Vulcan - perhaps M'Benga was right and the experience will give Jim a greater insight into his first officers modus vivendi.
The story is full of tenderness too - never lacks from your writing, I love it! Thank you for the happy ending.
PS: I kind of like to think that the Chameloid was there in the morning and smiled at seeing Kirk and Spock together - I am an incorrigible romantic. *smile*
I LOVE the idea that Malik was in the restaurant the next morning! I think you're absolutely right, that he was in the corner drinking juice when they came in. He saw them and smiled. Maybe he even caught Jim's eye and raised the glass in salute.
Thank you so much for reading! I worked on this for about eight months in total, because it was a story I wanted to read, so it means a lot to me that you enjoyed it. I feel like this is my biggest endeavor to date, original or fic! Thanks again.
Date: 12/28/2013 3:32 PM Title: Chapter 4
I love the way you take classic tropes of fan fiction, such as the involuntary bonding and the potential sex partner whose function is to show Kirk how much he wants Spock, and turn them on their heads and inside out. This was a wonderful, wonderful story. Thanks for a great read.
I can't tell you what that means to me -- thank you. I was terrified this would come across as cliche, so to hear that it felt like a different spin on a classic trope is a relief. I'm really happy you liked this story. Thanks so much for reading!
Date: 12/28/2013 3:00 PM Title: Chapter 3
It is eerie, reading the thoughts and words of a Kirk whose feelings and emotions are so cut off he is a stereotypical Vulcan. You pulled this off fantastically well.
I'm flattered that you think Kirk's portrayal works! Thank you so much.
Date: 12/22/2013 9:40 PM Title: Chapter 4
What a perfect conclusion to this story! The fact that Jim’s recovery takes time makes it seem so real. I love that he remembers events during the time he was unable to feel, but almost as though they happened to someone else. It’s especially poignant that he comes to understand Spock’s remorse and devotion by way of conversations with McCoy and Uhura; McCoy’s comment that “he took good care of you” is so touching.
The details of the shore leave on Risa are so well done. The dialogue especially is excellent, and everyone from the Enterprise remains absolutely in character in the casual setting. Loved the bit with Scotty and Uhura and the fruity drinks! By contrast, Jim waiting for Spock to show up feels sad even though it seems clear that Spock is just trying to give him some space. Jim’s encounter with the shape-shifter is an effective catalyst for his decision to return to the ship and the inevitable confrontation…which is just perfect. I’m delighted and relieved that they were able to bond! The small intimacies of their appearance in public the next morning – including Jim’s realization that they’re officially a couple – are every bit as sensual as the sex scene itself. Beautifully done. Thank you!
Oh, I'm so so happy that you liked the ending! Thank you for reading and for your help with the second part (I like it so much more after making your suggested changes). I had such a wonderful time working on this story over the past eight months, and it's rewarding to see it completed and to be able to share it with people.
Date: 12/21/2013 3:15 AM Title: Chapter 1
Really enjoyed this story. I had been following it and was pleased to see the final chapter. :) Great original idea. Great happy ending.
Thank you so much for reading! I'm thrilled that you enjoyed this.
Date: 12/21/2013 12:56 AM Title: Chapter 4
Amazing amazing amazing amazing!! I love how you flawlessly portrayed the events escalating to Jim's giving in and finally going to see Spock. The Chameloid scene was the perfect tipping point to accomplish this.
I'm very biased towards TOS characters so I find myself really resenting nu!Spock for being angry at Spock Prime. I can understand why and I can even see it being a valid reason, but even so... I feel infinitely sorry for what Spock Prime had to go through. I wonder how he made it on his own with the bond being servered again? </3
Also. My heart basically exploded when Jim took a picture of the flower and sent it to Spock Prime. WORDS FAIL TO FORM ON HOW MUCH I LOVED THAT!!!
Thank you for this amazing work!! You're my favorite Spirk author EVER.
Thank you very much! You were so encouraging while I was writing this, and I'm really happy you liked the way this ended.
I'm really glad you liked the flower at the end! I wanted to make sure that Spock Prime wasn't completely alone. I like to think that Jim is always there for him in some capacity. I'm so, so glad that I wrote this while simultaneously working with a Spock Prime/Jim Prime reunion story, because this is devastating from Spock Prime's POV. Rabidchild has suggested I write a companion piece from nu!Spock's POV, which would be interesting, but I'm trying to imagine this from Spock Prime's POV, and...I don't think I'd be able to see the screen if I tried to write it.
Thank you again!
Date: 12/20/2013 11:14 PM Title: Chapter 1
Thankyou so much for such a well-written and thoroughly engaging story!
Thank you very much for reading!
Date: 12/20/2013 9:05 PM Title: Chapter 1
I've seen other people write TOS episodes in AOS, and most of them have the dialogue and events exactly the same. It was great seeing the new guys reacting as themselves (even though I like the TOS guys better).
Having Jim be inadvertently bonded to Spock Prime -- and having Young Spock be scrupulous about respecting that bond -- was a nice twist and elevated your story above most of the others I've read.
Nice job all around!
I admit, I like the TOS guys better too! I just end up writing AOS for some reason. Thank you so much for reading!
Date: 12/08/2013 11:53 PM Title: Chapter 3
Oh my, this is so sad! Jim being unable to feel is a contradiction in terms, as though the very essence of what he is has been stolen. Spock admitting that he regrets having pushed Jim away just adds to the heartbreaking irony. At least it's a relief to know that Jim didn't just dream that Spock had been spending nights with him, and I'm hoping that they are now on the road to real recovery....
I think this might be the saddest thing I've ever worked on. I've really managed to upset myself several times in the process, but I really wanted to read this scenario, so I decided to write it when I couldn't find it. I'm so flattered by your feedback and just the fact that you read anything I write in the first place.
Date: 12/08/2013 11:41 PM Title: Chapter 2
Oh wow...very nice! That scene as you described it to me was exactly what I was hoping to see; your changes just bring it to life, and I consider them further evidence of what a fine writer you are. Actually, it hadn't occurred to me that you would consider making changes after the chapter had been posted, so this is extremely flattering besides being a real treat. I am loving this story!
I'm thrilled that the revisions worked better! Normally I wouldn't edit something which is posted, but I was comfy with it because this is still a WIP, and I think your suggestions were absolutely spot on. I like the scene so much more once I revised it in light of what you said, so I'm very grateful to you! Thank you again.
Date: 11/27/2013 6:50 AM Title: Chapter 2
I always like stories in which the plot takes off in an unexpected direction – and I did not see this one coming! The unrecognized bond is such an interesting twist that changes everything; I can’t help feeling bad for everyone involved.
Jim and Spock’s sexual encounter in the aftermath of “Operation: Annihilate!” is hot and beautifully intimate, though to me it feels somewhat abrupt given the circumstances. I had trouble believing that Spock would be allowed to leave Medbay moments after emerging from the test chamber and without undergoing tests to verify the results of a process that they were proposing to use on the entire population of Deneva. Then mere minutes after that, Jim and Spock are getting up close and personal. I really did love those scenes; the dialogue just seemed a bit too light-hearted considering that Spock had just lost his sight and his career, and life as he had known it had just been destroyed. On the other hand, I’m not discounting the possibility that this was intentionally done for some nefarious purpose that has yet to become clear….
The entire section about the breaking of the bond is wonderful. I love the idea that it requires expert intervention and has serious mental and physical consequences. Jim’s courage and determination and suffering all seem painfully real. It’s likewise so sad not knowing if he’ll be able to bond with his own Spock someday, not to mention whether or not Spock’s presence toward the end is real. Nicely done!
Thank you so much for your constructive feedback. I'm really appreciative. When I was writing this, the pacing worked because the episode ran that way, and I watched it several times when I was working on this. But on its own, I agree with you that the scene transition is too quick. With their conversation, I was playing the "We're both known for doing stupid things when emotionally compromised; let's sleep together instead of discussing the problem at hand!" but if you felt it was too light, it was too light. I'm going to edit the transition and the conversation, to (I hope) get that across this time. I read your email at 4am, and my brain worked on this while I was asleep, so I think I know what I'm going to do. It wasn't mean to be sex for the sake of sex, but both of them feeling desperate, exhausted, and scared -- acting out in what is actually a really stupid way, even though it was what they both want. I think you're 100% right, and I'm glad this is a WIP so I feel comfortable editing it.
I employed my mom's knowledge for the bond breaking and its aftermath. She teaches anatomy/physiology, so we yanked out a textbook and talked about areas of the brain, what might be affected, how a shield might work. She even coined a phrase for one of the meds Jim is given, which will be in the next section. It was really great to bring her into the process!
Thank you again!
Date: 11/26/2013 6:06 AM Title: Chapter 1
This story is so good. You're my favorite spirk writer.
and maybe you're the only one who is willing to write some bottom!jim stories right now.
Thank you so much! I'm really happy that you're enjoying this story so far.
You know, I've never thought about it, but...I think I've written him as a bottom in everything I've written so far. How funny!
Date: 11/23/2013 11:28 PM Title: Chapter 1
i love all the connections you made to the original series! especially since Operation Annihalate and City on the Edge of Forever were such awesome episodes, with so much potential for how Spock and Jim develop their relationship. And the angst!! I adore the angst in this story, but I do hope Jim recovers soon. And Jim's question about whether Old!Spock could still bond with Old!Jim if he was there.... hmmm, I suspect there's a happy reunion in the future!
Thank you! I really love TOS and the movies, so I'm happy the references are standing out. This is easily the angstiest thing I've written for the Trek fandom, but I'm glad you're enjoying that aspect! Thanks so much for reading.
Date: 11/23/2013 7:20 PM Title: Chapter 2
Oh... everyone is hurting! Everyone! Gah! I loved this chapter (of course, you minx) and the brilliant twist with Jim's (eventually explained) insight flowing through the bond... Can you fix those boys, please, soon?
Thank you so much! I'm really glad you liked the twist (I was nervous it had been done to death).
Date: 11/23/2013 1:25 AM Title: Chapter 2
This is incredible, world-class writing, with an emotional depth and realism that just blows me away. I never thought I'd read such a credible, convincing account of what it feels like to be telsu, or experience a blocked or broken bond. Accidental bonding is too often a gimmick in K/S fan fiction; you make it character-driven, and real.
Thank you so much for the lovely compliment! I'm really happy you're enjoying this and that the twist didn't come across as too gimmicky. I'm relieved! Thanks again!
Date: 11/22/2013 11:44 PM Title: Chapter 2
Awe, what a sad chapter... Honestly, all I could really think about was the one we didn't see or hear much about: Spock Prime. I feel so bad for him. What could he have been going through when Jim started exploring the bond? And now that it's broken yet again... = ( He already lost his Jim once and now has to endure it again.
I guess the remedy is to revive Kirk Prime? ;D
I repeat myself over and over every time I write a review for you so I'm sorry to be so predictable. But, I'll say this yet again..... I love love love love your writing so much!!!!
It made me so happy to see your name! You aren't predictable. I honestly appreciate every word. It means so much to me that you read my stuff!
This was a sad chapter...I admit to getting upset writing it. It's been in the works for months, so it's bizarre for it to be out in the open. I hope you enjoyed it, despite it being sad, and thank you again.