Date: 12/07/2014 11:06 AM Title: Chapter 6:The Captain's Conference
Your first experience was quite satisfying.
In a cave behind the waterfall, not a cliche.
Safe sex is certainly important - well done you thought about it!
The last chapter was very deep and spiritual. Very different from the other chapters.
In conclusion, it was Vahltsooh the time.
Date: 06/28/2011 5:19 AM Title: Chapter 6:The Captain's Conference
Erotica: So very well done by you. I truly don't know where to start...I write poetry, but never could I write like this...your beautiful words are like poetry to me....you give their union together..their first time so much understanding and trust. I am truly moved with your words...
Date: 06/28/2011 3:53 AM Title: Chapter 2:Opening Pandora's Box
God, this was an amazing chapter..you really made me think in a different way each little piece of the episodes where Spock is struggling.....rage, jealousy...have you ever had those feelings before....That must have struck home for Spock..and I just realized that now reading it....many people think the mind fusion to be a mind meld..but I do believe it to be so much more personal....The look on his face when he leaves there...says so much...
I truly enjoyed this little piece...off to read another..
Date: 06/28/2011 12:07 AM Title: Chapter 6:The Captain's Conference
Sorry, I'll try to be less enthusiastic next time LOL ;D
Nah, despite my little niggles I really enjoyed this! You've got great promise as a writer - some of your imagery is really outstanding and I think you've got a unique voice. It could do with a little polishing, but hey - nobody's perfect.
Well done on this story!
Thanks, and reviewers were right about the end of the last chapter of comming out. I've replaced he with Kirk, makes more sense.
Dont know about you but I can read something loads and think it s OK, then a reviewer spots the obvious non connection or gap in the story. (Grr frustration annoyance with self)
I find it hard to write connectng passages. Reviewing I realise how little I have involved individuals beyond the triumvirate I need to do some character writing exploration. I have great admiration for those who can invent missions and new worlds. My fics are far too analytic, will have to try some challenges that force exploration
Keep comments coming
I've tried to give you a bit more on Jimat the start of Spontaneity but ran out of steam/ideas would love you to review and add improvements
Date: 06/27/2011 10:47 PM Title: Chapter 5:Exorcism
Ah, so the Nashinahr got a mention... I love those little geeky things that hardly anyone knows about - they really make my day!
It seems like quite a quick turn around for Kirk and Spock - you know, what with Spock having been on the verge of insanity and Kirk being utterly oblivious... but I'll run with it.
I never did buy the whole 'they have to keep their relationship secret due to regulations' thing, but I'll wait and see where you go with it.
Liking this though, it's strangely addictive!
My goodness reviews before all six chapters are up.
It's a quick TAT for Kirk, but Spock has been aware of teh situation for the past two years (Season)
Date: 06/27/2011 10:36 PM Title: Chapter 4: Reflections
So, what response then? Is Jim finally starting to see things how they really are?
You have challenged me here
I have had almost 40 years of Spock world view but really only got to appreciate Kirk since 2009 sent me through a worm hole back to TOS universe and beyond.
Its time to try to think through Jim. So I have decided to add Jim's analysis to the next section. It's in character for Jim to APPEAR to look before he leaps. The truth is he has a unique way of perceiving the universe , one that got him the captaincy, one which has kept him out of trouble when lesser captains have perished.
Hope you like the attempt. Basic section has been written, hope to add Jims reflections.
Also plan to modify the Janice meld. I found a couple of pages that I wrote which clarifies Kirk's expereince of that fusion.
Date: 06/27/2011 10:31 PM Title: Chapter 2:Opening Pandora's Box
Poor Spock... poor, poor Spock.
I love this chapter - you've put such an interesting spin on these TOS episodes! It's great.
If Spock were a woman Jim would have understood the touch, the love that lay beneath, but that was the last thing he would associate with Spock. It sort of fitted with The Janice/Kirk gender switch.
There are some parts of the series that will make MUCH more sense with subsequent sections of the series.
Am new to creative writing so need to hone skills on spinning sections out and adding more connective detail, will be good in future to look back at these first attempts.
Date: 06/27/2011 9:43 PM Title: Chapter 1:Intimate touch
Just wondering... in the last line, are you sure you mean Spock, not Jim?
Looks like a very interesting story... I'll be following this one. It is a WIP, I take it? You might want to categorise it as such.
Thanks for posting!
MMH Each section stands alone and complete. The whole series connected is a work in progress. I have decided to put up each section's chapters in one go. You are reading TOOO fast.
Date: 06/27/2011 9:29 PM Title: Chapter 1:Intimate touch
To add multiple descriptions, hold down control key while choosing the various types you want to include in any given story. Then it will let you use several.
Thanks, have made it work for one section. Hopefully will make it work for Characters