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Reviewer: Mtnhi32 Signed [Report This]
Date: 06/03/2012 12:54 PM Title: Chapter 1

Oh...love. I bookmarked this one...

Reviewer: nhrc Signed [Report This]
Date: 06/07/2011 9:22 PM Title: Chapter 1

A perfect ending sentence for no less than perfect story

It was soft and sweet and painful and sad ...
He had it all

you moved me, my heart beating like a lullaby

Reviewer: Damej Signed starstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 06/14/2010 12:45 AM Title: Chapter 1

So Awesome.
Some truly beautiful imagery there.
So nice for the boys to get happy right away for once,
we all love the angst but it can be a little tedious at times.
They don't ALWAYS have to suffer first and this story is a perfect example of how the plot needn't suffer for the lack of angst.
Well Done

Reviewer: roswellfan Signed [Report This]
Date: 05/09/2010 4:12 AM Title: Chapter 1

I really liked it and found the descriptions to be captivating.

Reviewer: SeviesSpike Signed [Report This]
Date: 03/06/2010 11:48 AM Title: Chapter 1

This was..different from what I usually read. Different and lovely. "Without breaking their contact, Jim assured him in no uncertain terms of his total forgiveness." I completely appreciated this line and how it combined so many moments so perfectly. Great job and kudos to Greywolf The Wanderer as well :)

Reviewer: Greywolf the Wanderer Signed [Report This]
Date: 10/20/2009 7:43 AM Title: Chapter 1

Yah hey... if ya need a beta I'd be willin'.  Kind of at loose ends at the moment, could use to do something constructive, nies?  ;-)>  It *is* a fun read!

Greywolf

Reviewer: verizonhorizon Anonymous starstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 10/19/2009 2:16 PM Title: Chapter 1

This story is too awesome to have as many distracting grammar errors as it does. I think it's so good that you should absolutely have someone beta it, b/c it's great and deserving of that editing love and attention.

So many fun, unexpeted metaphors, like the dolphins, Chutes and Ladders jefferies tubes, etc. It was a little weird that Kirk said he wasn't that drunk but then couldn't even walk. If you can't walk, you know you're drunk. And drinking as a plot-device for getting characters together for the first time is always irritating to me, yet because you wrote it so well I liked it anyway. Whee! For example, yay mind melds! You did a good job slipping from Kirk's pov to Spock's, and that's tricky stuff. Thumbs up!



Author's Response:

Thank you for the compliments and the very appropriate criticisms, lol It was 4 am and I possibly put it up a bit premature. If you are willing (or anyone else for that matter) to beta it I would be happy to re post the result. Also I fumbled with copy paste function resulting in a wierd formatting (could have just uploded from google docs...now why didn't I think of that), as far as the whole "drunk, i'm not 'that' drunk" Kirk perspective could stand a little more inner dialouge, he knows he that drunk....he's just not pukeing sick yet.....it's a fine line.

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